last night i got all dressed up formal style, one step down from a suit, and went rollerblading at 3am. i got back at 5am. the automotive pilots looked strangely at me. but it was fun. its fun to make noise on the road while people try to sleep. it gave me time to relax, ponder the universe, liberate a street sign, and camouflage it in some nearby tall grass for later use.
Lately it seems that time has been moving faster than i, and i am back to a 6am bedtime and 6pm wakeup. which means i am going to have to start gettin reaquainted with my beloved sleeping drugs. the last time i took those damn sleeping drugs i remember going into the shower for no reason, and waking up smelling like vinegar. i dont know what happened.
I start at my new uni soon. i dont know what im going to do, i'm not going to know anyone there. but to be perfectly honest, i am sick of being quiet and shy when it comes to meeting new people.
I met this girl in canada, and all i did was talk to her for a little while at a party. now she's coming here with my cousins for a visit. i am in shock.
GREETINGS! Okay now that the pleasantries are out of the way...
I speak now to all my sexually deprived heterosexual male and lesbian blogslaves: its about time for some hardcore porn. Okay, here we go...
i would have made a 'click here if you are under 18' button to send the kiddies back to the last page they were viewing and thereby protect their fragile little minds... but to be honest, i doubt very highly anybody would ever click it. even a 6 year old wouldn't click it.
So here we go, prepare your various genital organs gentlemen and or ladies...
And just in time for Valentines Day too. I think... when's Valentines Day?
GREETINGS blogslaves'o'mine. how goes your living?
i am about to hand in my application to join the legion of McSlaves, but before i do this thing, i have decided make post.
As we all know valentines day is fast bearing down on us, and i for one have already found my valentine. It is a plastic blowfish from McDonalds. It lights up red to show that it loves me. And also it squirts water.
Now don't go over the top people, i dont know if this is 'the one', but i am pretty excited about this. This could be the start of something beautiful. Untill what ever batteries make it light up red run out. Then i will know the horrible truth, and it will all be over. But if a realationship isn't waiting on the batteries of a plastic mass produced blowfush, then what is it? ...i should write hallmark cards.
i can tell right now that if i continue to write, this post is going to degenerate into a hideous blob of mindless nonsense about how i wish i had blue skin. So to save you all from that horrible fate, instead i will end this post now with a picture of a chicken about to be eaten. Adeus
=http://img22.photobucket.com/...
rice in traditional red thai sauce tastes like vomit
Okay, seriously... is there anything that is NOT funny about chickens? and i'll add pidgeons to that question too. Im deadly serious here. think about it.
My grandma says she used to have blue and red and green chickens on her farm, because she would inject food colouring into the eggs.
Here is a picture. It is entitled: "Sneaky
Like all naughty children, little billy was about to be eaten by a sneaky thing.
I just finished watching Yellow Submarine. That is quite possibly, one of the most disturbing movies i have ever seen. Their voices! The Music! The Animation! THE LOVE! It's like being really really drunk and staring at a music visualisation on a big screen TV. I don't know how to describe it, but i think i have been mentally scarred by this. the twitching's gonna start, i know it.
i think... im slowly going... completely mad.
- squee
Frozen Chips and Unnecessary Abuse of a Shaving-Razorblade
Okay here's the thing, i was just about to write a neat little post here, but then i suddenly remembered i left my bowl of chips in the freezer! I had put them in there earlier because they were too hot for my amazing mouth to consume at the time. It is now 2 hours later, and i only just remembered them, i raced to the freezer amid a flurry of curse words, and pulled out my frost covered chips (literally). This is a tragic event my friends/blog-slaves. Chipsare never the same once you re-heat them. But just incase it's different for some reason this time, i have stuck the frozen block of chip mass into the oven, and set it as high as it will go. Hopefully that'll warm them up better than the microwave ever could, and hopefully they will even be edible :? I will let you know how this works out as the post progresses.
... ...... ..um.... nothing to report droogs, but more importantly my chips seem to be sizzling away nicely in the oven. They might even be edible! I can hear them sizzling from all the way in here :) i can smell-- ...OH SHIT!
Okay chips are slightly incinerated, but still good. They smell edible, but now they're too hot. ...again.
Okay i put chips in the freezer, set the alarm on my mobile for 3 minutes, and plugged it in to get around any funky battery nonsense.
..i cant wait for my chips :D Im too distracted by this whole chip operation! i'll write a better blog thing next time. i promise. In the mean time enjoy this lovely work of art completed by a ..uh.. by a mister "Lord Squee the Amazing". The work is Entitled: "Where is it Gone?"
Oh and for those who are interested, and also those that just can't stop reading my enchanting literary excrement... due to extreme 3am boredom, i am now balder than an 11 year old and infinately as itchy. I won't describe my hideous situation any further for fear of scaring off my naturalist minions; and if a side effect, of this decision not to go beyond implications, happens to saves me a level of embarrassment about my fretful situation, then that is purely coincidental. Thankyou and Goodnight. ...MY CHIPS!! :D yesssssssss
UPDATE: Chips taste gooooood, i can't believe im on a role in the kitchen! of all places for your humble ruler-to-be! ........I think i might take on noodles next.
AH! Damn vomit flesh bunnies attacking my smell head, trolley eating garden monkey with your fried eye don't look at the wheelbarrow death comes to any and all blender chickens who cross my yellow road of elephant intestines and toaster pastries i need sleep
...it's 5:06am.
Also i am becoming addicted to my little sister's bubblegum flavoured toothpaste that she left in this house. i am eating it straight from the tube. When i was little and these bubblegum flavoured toothpastes were actually bought for me, i would take them into my room and eat a whole tube in one sitting. that toothpaste makes a child sick. But i have a stonger stomach now.
Here is a thing i made. it took a long time to colour. Cower in awesome terror at its hideous carrot-like eyes.
...excuse me while i go into a coma. (from lack of sleep, not excess consumption of bubblegum toothpaste)
